Saturday, 16 June 2007

Un Peu Loufoque Strikes a Pose!

I was rather vexed with Chief Patissier this morning as he refused absolutely to allow me to utilize his spare German machine gun in my painting. He claims, totally unreasonably, that having two unwashed and wounded servants dressed as soldiers, one of whom has a weeping head wound the other 3rd degree burns on his knees, which I may add are only very slightly infected, contravenes his idea of what is appropriate in a biscuiterie and further more may well distract the staff from their gallette making. I can not help but feel that my husband is being less than supportive of my art!

However I shall not give up and therefore took Loic and Jacques to the village Calvary in the dog cart, along with all my painting paraphernalia and commenced work there. Alas it had rained rather heavily all night and has continued to do so on and off all morning so that the road was somewhat muddy, and at one stage the governess cart became bogged down in a rut. Fortunately Loic managed to dig us out with his spade attachment whilst Jacques held the horse’s head. The fresh splattering of mud on their costumes added quite an authentic touch, which cheered me up no end!

All went exceptionally well, despite the inconvenience of my having to re-arrange the tableau several times after Loic began to list uncontrollably sideways when his leg sunk into the mud and Jacques complained of feeling faint. I finally settled on a pose with the two of them positioned at the foot of the large stone crucifix, and had just started my preliminary outlines on the canvas when the heavens opened and a tremendous thunderstorm announced itself with a deafening crash!

Luckily I had had the foresight to direct Jaques to rig up a large tarpaulin over the governess cart so that I and my canvas were admirably protected from the deluge. However Jaques made himself quite a nuisance, complaining repeatedly about being cold and wet. Loic of course posed perfectly, the unexpected thunderclap having reduced him, comme habitude, to a catatonic state.
Despite my determination to continue I had to sadly admit defeat as the failing light was making it impossible to continue and the rain so heavy that I was unable to see my subjects clearly, so reluctantly I packed my things away and returned Chez Nous to a rather pleasant lunch of warming soup, roti de porc, followed by ile flotant.
Loic and Jaqcues being covered in mud and soaking wet I could not of course permit them to travel back with me in the governess cart and risk staining the upholstery so I left them to follow on foot, Jacques carrying Loic over his shoulder. This seemed to take them an inordinate length of time so I was forced to direct Madame Grognonne to go and see to Marron, the horse, and give him a good rub down for fear of his catching cold, which would never do at all!

I believe this painting to be by the artist Gauguin and is a rather bizarre depiction of local Breton Women in their Sunday best sitting by the village cross. Why Christ is yellow is a mystery, possibly the artist had been staring to long into the sun patiently attempting to control his mounting temper whilst waiting for his models to sit still and decease from chattering so that he might continue his work. One can only sympathize, as a fellow artist; I know from today’s tedious experiences that ones models may be unbelievably vexatious should the mood take them!


muddyboots said...

bonjoir.. zis could onlee 'appen en France non? 'ear ve 'ave zee risk assesment & anti cruelty to vorkerz lawz. 'zis iz jus not fair.. oui?

snailbeachshepherdess said...

..and 'elf and safety'....Heaven only knows what they would say about my hero and his spade attachment! Which reminds me ..have you rubbed his chest with the goosgrease after him getting wet yesterday? Should he develop earache...a hot shallot in the ear would help...a sore throat...a piece of bacon tied round the neck will do the don't go there...that involves tying LIVE things round the neck and I think poor Loic has enough to contend with as it is!

snailbeachshepherdess said...

Aha ...that's why Gaugin's Christ was yellow...the model had a quick rub down with the goosegrease to keep out the turns I'm told!

Elizabethd said...

A touch of jaundice maybe?

muddyboots said...

perhaps they used butter instead of goosegrease?

Fennie said...

Could you please paint a picture (whether in yellow tints or no) of your one armed one legged Loic digging?

It is impossible to dig with a French spade even if you have two arms and two legs, so however does Loic do it?

(Glad to see the saga has continued in my absence - F)

Faith said...

Definitely the same colour as the butter I bought today in the farmer's market!


Ah you see Fennie that is the cleverness of the spade attachemment to Loics artifial leg you do not need hands just a strong downwards thrust with the knee! Early training in Breton dancing is useful in the acquisition of this skill!

@themill said...

Well, Un Peu, if you hear of a narrowboat sinking in Alsace Loraine I feel you may be a little responsible. -I have just priinted off the last three weeks of your adventures as my holiday reading (along with exmoorjane's Walker') and I fear the small rainforest will be too much for the vessel. Wish me luck!
a bientot (without all the squiggly bits because I don't have a French keyboard)

WesterWitch/Headmistress said...

Gosh Un Peu - you are all heart . . . LOL

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